wanting to move to america....

I live in the midlands in UK, I live in a place where there's nothing, nowhere to get a good job and hardly anything to do in my free time from school. This summer holidays, me and my friends had to go out of where we live so we could do fun things with everyone. I honestly hate where I live and I'm been thinking about if I could move where I would go..

Then I thought America is my dream location to live in, there's so many places to go there and its so big!! I would love to live in California where there's nice weather, gorgeous houses and places where I could go to have a good time! I would to go and live there; I've dreamt about moving there but the problem is my mum or dad would have to get a job over there and we would all have to get a green card so we could move. Sometimes I would just love to be American so I wouldn't have to go through it all. The Uk's alright if you live in a place where's there's place to have fun and easily get a job there too.

But if I did move, I know that I probably wouldn't miss anyone expect for my family and best friend, I wouldn't miss my other friends as much and I know that if my mum said that we could move to America, I wouldn't think twice about saying yes!!!

does anyone here want to move to somewhere else if they could???

xoxo

 

Whisper???

So I was basically minding my own business on Facebook as you do when I came across this new app that's been out for a while (I think) and its called Whisper. I decided to download it for free -Yay - and see what all the gossip was about..
Its not hard to work out that its where you upload pictures and on it is something that is secret and either people can 'heart' it, reply to it or message you privately which tbh is pretty weird.... Anyways I thought ill start so I have and for my first day, its gone pretty well expect from this weird man - I think - whos asked for my facebook name and told me that you'll take me to 'orgasmland' which as far as I know doesn't exist (well I hope not, or that would be fll of predos like him/her).
All I can say is go and get the app, its cool and your basically letting out all your worries and secrets, but you could get abuse off it still, try it like I did!
P.s. I love blogging and the people who read my posts, it means so much!
x

Coming back from holidays!

Everyone loves holiday right? Yeah, even just the ones that you go to in the same country with your family. Their fun and different; you can relax or do exciting activities like climbing up mountains or diving into deep oceans. Holidays are what makes summer, summer! 

I went to Turkey last week where I went to my first five star hotel which just my luck, all the hot boys were either German or another language I don't know. :( (I'm learning German at school but at the moment I'm shocking, going retake both my exams next year). I've also got a totally natural tan now, from the boiling hot sun and got some new purple dre beats, a Hollister top to add to my collection, a lakers jersey which I've fallen in love with and a pair of nike air Maxs! Yay me!! 

But the biggest problem about holidays isn't the security checks at airports but the important gossip you haven't heard or all the posts that your missed on Facebook and Instagram. All through my holiday  I've had to wait till the end of seven long days to find out if justin biebers new song is out yet but luckily, it isn't be because  I didn't want to miss that! And when you turn your phone on for the first time after you arrive in your country, all the messages from Facebook, whatsapp, bbm and texts come through and you have to go through them all! It takes forever but they're all full of gossip and story's from the last week. I think that's the problem with being aboard, with no Internet or even just a tiny bit where it's so slow there's no point, and missing out on everything. I've missed two parties while I went including one of my best friends who invited the boy I like!:( but yay, what party's better than new clothes and a gorgeous tan! Woop woop yay! 

X

Ever had them days...

Have you ever had them days where you feel empty, no emotions you just feel sick and depressed. No one can put a smile on your face, not even your favourite film or person? When all you want to do is dream about happiness and all the regrets you have and how you can change them if you could; all the things you wish you had and you wish you hadn't...

Yeah I've in that certain mood today! Not only that but not even justin bieber can make me smile. All I've done today is sit around and felt like being  sick and crying untill theres no tears left. You don't know what's happened or what you've done but you feel like the whole world is hating on you and bitching beside your back... Like life is giving you a punishment for no reason. 

There's no symptoms and all you can do is dream and forget about everyone and everything. Hope that tomorrow is going to be the total opposite to today and maybe life might make you happy for once! You want to tell people how you feel and if your the only one with feeling this way but you can't be doing with even talking to someone or seeing anyone without hitting them across the face. You feel so lonely and bored, but even with people who try to talk to you, you in a way want to be alone and feel lonely! 

It's so confusing being in this type of mood but there's no way out of it, all I want to do is sleep but I can't, something is in my mind but I don't know what. I feel sick and ill, something keeps me wondering and worrying  about something but its not clear . It's so stressful and depressing.....

You sort of feel like nothing and no one cares about you or your feelings, it's wrong but so right at the same time........?

Best friends forever??

So hey, been a while since I've last blogged my life but I've been on two holidays since then :) they both were sooo goooddddd! One to the nice sometimes friendly Germany and the super active Centre Parcs in England (my home country).... Yeah I'm British yay me! 

Anyways my holidays are not the centre of conversation on this post it's my problem with my best friend. Me and my bestie who shall not be named but ill use a code name like shity, if you know me and her, you'll get the pun. Well going back on my one of many problems, me and shity aren't as close as we were but we went on holiday to centre parcs. It's really weird as this one girl - that's already done this before on another girl with her bestfriend on our table - is getting more closer and I know this sounds childish but its  like taking shity aways from me. Honestly no joke everyone on my table already are starting to notice  as well of me. What should I say, I mean the other day this best pal robber said she'll never do that but really... ? Should I believe her, :( I'm so confused but in a different kind of way... 

Is there any advice you guys have for me ??.?

Xoxo this pic below are these rings me and shity really want and it's meant to mean forever....

good karma???

So hey, fancy telling you lot what I try and do everyday which isn't really working lately for me :s ..

So, I don't normally listen in re lessons but I thought a few weeks ago I should, so I did and karma was the subject. I knew what it was coz we're done it before but now I totally got It all. I thought maybe I should follow karma and see what happens so I started.
I tried to do one single thing everyday which wasn't for my benefit but for someone else, something dead simple like helping someone out or ding what they asked. If I did it everyday then I would at least have something good in return as for good karma but did it??

No... it didn't , well I don't think it did. I totally gave up and left it but I believe that now bad shit going start happening to me ....  I mean if good karma did work then why hasn't it yet, do I have to do a big huge thing to get something in return or do I get karma back as nothing fucked up has happened to me personally.... actually fuck yeah I has !!!!
Not to be but to my lifelong friend, Linda. She was my child-minder all through my life as a child, she was like a mother figure to me. She loved me and I loved her with all my little heart. I mean I never got close to her again while I didn't go because I stopped going hers at 13, but ill always love her. She knew my secrets and my problems as I knew she would never judge me or tell anyone. She's meanwhile, fighting for her life in hospital, with a damaged lung and liver. She's in a coma and doesn't know that she's in hospital. I hope and pray she gets better and will wake up to continue a healthy and happy life but deep down I know she's not going to wake up... 

Karmas shit and I hope it gets better for everyone, try doing what I did and if it works for you that's good but don't get your hopes up.....
much love xxxx   

Missed signals ??

Is it just me or do lads always seem to give you missed signals??
Boys are so confusing like how they give you so many little signs which convince you that they seem to have some sort of feelings for you then go off to some 'perfect' girl! 

This is my story: I'm single and depressed, everyone I know is either going out with someone or at least talking to someone but me , oh me , I'm talking to no one and feeling quite lonely tbh! I used to a really really nice lad the other week which lasted bout a month but all of a sudden we stopped and acted like we never even spoke before :( anyways I know this one boys, he's not the ones from e other post as I'm decided to just be close friends which is soo much better; well this boys just keeps giving me these small but noticeable signs that got be thinking.. He always seems to get my attention  and sometimes even touching my back or arm as he does it. We talked loads the other while I was out, shared a drink and hugged at the end of the night as he went in with a goodnight. The problem to this story is that he seems to really like this younger girl who is the prettiest girl I have seen in my school. She's nice , friendly and utterly gorgeous. He's obsessed with her and its clear that he likes her a load. I kinda feel stupid as I started liking him but not I'm confused what to do. This girl doesn't want a boyfriend but I reckon this boys her expecting to that... 

Does anyone have this same problem as well?? :S